Actor, director, writer, and producer Tyler Perry may be comfortable playing lots of vastly different roles, but he always stays true to himself. While that version of himself might not always be the best (Perry is allegedly a nightmare to work for), the “Gone Girl” star has been refreshingly honest about his past struggles with poverty, a tumultuous upbringing, and even his later issues with his position in life. Following Perry’s separation from the mother of his son, Gelila Bekele, the filmmaker described being 51 and single as “what a midlife crisis looks like” in a post on Instagram. The couple had been together for 11 years, and even after the birth of their son Aman in 2014, marriage was never in the cards for Perry.
A notoriously busy bee, the prolific producer’s bachelor lifestyle looks a lot like work, work, and more work. With notable titles such as “Divorced Sistas” and “Tyler Perry’s Divorce in the Black” coming out since the breakup, his aversion to the institution seems clear. There are plenty of Hollywood stars who have never gotten married, but considering that Perry is an outspoken Christian with financial ties to the Black Church, it’s strange that the “Madea” creator is seemingly opposed to a core belief of his religion. However, the application of theology is fluid, and identity might play a larger role in how Perry chooses to live his life.
Tyler Perry’s anti-marriage stance may be rooted in insecurity
Between courses to be bought online, dating apps, and a widespread “loneliness epidemic,” men seemingly are more desperate than ever to find connection, leading nefarious types to capitalize off it. In a YouTube video entitled “Death to ‘Black Love'(™),” cultural critic F.D. Signifier explores the struggles facing Black couples and individuals in particular as they relate to “Black Love,” which has become a commodifiable branding aesthetic. While discussing how it relates to gender roles, Signifier defines the performance of “high quality masculinity” as being the provider or protector in a romantic relationship.
This sentiment is echoed by Tyler Perry’s rejection of romance before making his way out of poverty, with the actor lamenting in a 2019 interview with The Times: “For 10, maybe 15 years, I got lost in the madness of [his career]. I didn’t date, I didn’t want kids, I didn’t want anything until I’d reached a place where I felt financially comfortable,” (via Us Weekly). Deciding to remain unattached even after achieving worldwide notoriety and success is a protest against a cultural institution that doesn’t satisfy his lifestyle and needs.
In fact, it could be argued that Perry’s hypercritical films on marriage and relationships could be seen as a direct attack on this idea of a “Black Love (™)” branding aesthetic. Especially after overcoming a troubled relationship with the man who raised him, being a good father is Perry’s top priority. Maintaining a harmonious co-parenting relationship with his former partner, and stepping up to his duties as a godfather to Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s daughter, Lilibet, Perry makes the bachelor life look pretty radical.