Engagement season is upon us, with December being the most popular month to propose worldwide, according to The Knot.
And while traditionally men have been expected to shell out for that diamond — as Beyoncé put it in 2008, he should’ve “put a ring on it” — many women are changing their expectations around who makes the purchase.
Nearly 71% (70.6%) of women say they’re willing to contribute to the cost of their engagement ring, according to DatingAdvice.com‘s recent Holiday Engagement Survey of 1,000 partnered U.S. adults.
Almost 19% said they would pay for the ring in full, about 23% said they’d partially pay and 29% said they would contribute if needed.
Here’s why Natassia Miller, a certified sexologist who founded the sex and relationship coaching company Wonderlust, thinks women might be changing their tune.
There are more dual-income couples these days
There are more couples earning two salaries, with or without kids, than there were a decade ago, according to the Pew Research Center.
And while, on average, the gender wage gap persists, there are some metro areas in the U.S. where women under the age of 30 earn as much as or more than their male counterparts, according to Pew.
“Today, with more dual‑income couples and women delaying marriage while they build careers,” says Miller, “there’s more openness to treating the ring as a shared investment.”
Some ‘couples are more pragmatic’
This piece of jewelry is expensive: The average cost of an engagement ring is $5,200, according to The Knot.
And headlines abound about Americans’ financial hardships. Overall prices are up 25% since January 2020, for example, according to Consumer Price Index data, and nearly half of Americans believe their financial situation worsened this year, according to a recent survey by Intuit Credit Karma.
“Against that backdrop, it makes sense that couples are more pragmatic,” says Miller. “Instead of one partner taking on debt to hit an arbitrary ring budget, some women would rather share the cost and keep the purchase aligned with reality.”
It’s a ‘public symbol’ that says ‘someone committed to me’
Finally, even as they consider their financial realities, women are willing to pay because the ring is symbolic.
“Even women who are financially independent often grew up on a steady diet of rom‑coms, social media proposals, and bridal marketing where the ring is framed as proof of worthiness and desirability,” says Miller.
For many women, “an engagement ring is still a public symbol that says, ‘Someone committed to me, and is willing to show that to the world.'”
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