Filmmaker Karan Johar recently opened up about how his childhood experiences continue to affect the way he parents his twins, Yash and Roohi. In a conversation with Sania Mirza on her podcast Serving It Up with Sania, Karan shared that he was bullied for his weight as a child, something that left a lasting mark on his emotional well-being and self-perception. Those painful memories, he revealed, still influence his parenting decisions today.
“I want to tell you that 50% of me is so scarred by my childhood that I get paranoid that my kids would gain weight. I carry childhood trauma. I keep saying, ‘Don’t eat sugar.’ But a part of me wants to liberate them from it,” he said, explaining the conflict between wanting to protect his children and not wanting to pass on his anxieties. “I get angry if they miss or bunk a football class because they have too many classes in school,” he added, describing how his fear manifests in everyday life.
Karan also recalled his own experiences of exclusion: “I remember I was told, play dabba gul because football is not for you.” Those words, he said, still echo in his mind. The filmmaker admitted to being “in a conflicted zone of parenting,” adding that he is constantly worried about how societal pressures, especially those magnified by social media, might impact his children. “Their screen time is limited, but still, things pop up. Because of things being said at school, I have changed my clothing so they don’t have to be afraid of what people will say at school. I am a maximalist, but now I have changed because I am worried about my kids. I am worried they might go online and find some clips that may embarrass them. I want my kids to be accepting of everything and everyone.”
How unresolved childhood traumas influence a parent’s behaviour and anxieties when raising their own children
Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, “Yes, unresolved childhood trauma — such as bullying, rejection, or body shaming — can deeply shape how a parent perceives safety, self-worth, and control, often spilling into their parenting style. When those wounds remain unhealed, parents may unconsciously project their past fears onto their children.”
This overprotection or control often comes from love but is rooted in fear, not trust. Khangarot states, “Healing requires self-work: acknowledging that the past pain belongs to them, not their child; seeking therapy to process old shame or fear; and learning to respond rather than react. When parents tend to their own inner wounds, they create space to parent from empathy rather than anxiety — offering the freedom and safety they once needed themselves.”
How parents can recognise when their desire to protect or improve their children’s habits starts stemming from fear
Khangarot says that parents like Karan Johar, who feel anxious about their children’s habits or appearance, may be unconsciously reacting to their own unresolved insecurities, perhaps linked to body image, social judgment, or childhood experiences of criticism.
A healthy motivation supports growth; a fear-driven one seeks control. “The psychological parameter lies in flexibility and emotional tone — if the parent can accept mistakes, adjust expectations, and separate the child’s identity from their fears, the intent is nurturing. But if they react with guilt, anger, or panic when the child doesn’t meet certain standards, it reflects an internal wound being reactivated,” says Khangarot.
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Some ways parents can heal from their own past emotional wounds
Khangarot asserts that parents can begin healing from their own emotional wounds by first acknowledging that their past experiences — whether neglect, bullying, or shame — continue to influence how they respond to their children. Awareness is the first step: noticing triggers like excessive worry, overcorrection, or guilt helps them see where old fears are resurfacing.
“Engaging in therapy, journaling, or inner child work allows them to process those unresolved emotions rather than projecting them onto their children. Practicing mindful pauses before reacting, using open communication, and allowing their child to express feelings without judgment create emotional safety at home,” concludes the expert.