Do you often find yourself wondering what food to cook, how to cook it, and even that dreaded question—how much of it? It’s a daily struggle for all of us, but need not be with our food horoscope. Satisfaction is only a click away!
Aries
Details will bury you like a paper avalanche today, effectively frustrating and annoying the hell out of you. Seek out something later today that will soothe your nerves while being refreshingly free of the finer points. Spaghetti. Meatballs. Marinara sauce. It doesn’t get any less adorned than that.
Taurus
Your stubborn side will come to fore today. This will make you difficult to work and deal with. So don’t be surprised if people shy away from you. Loneliness may force you to make amends. But don’t have a big tuna sub for lunch. The fish breath won’t earn you any new friends.
Gemini
Corresponding electronically with friends through may be fast, but it’s so impersonal. Buck the trend today by inviting friends to a raucous Mexican dinner where everyone can catch up. Margaritas will mellow everyone out, and nachos and enchiladas will have you all delightfully fat and happy.
Cancer
Who needs a therapist when mental and spiritual relief is right there in your kitchen? Root around and put together a meal that will comfort your downtrodden spirit. A cheesy pesto lasagna will do the trick, and it won’t cost you 90 dollars an hour.
Leo
You sleep-deprived may have to reassess your nighttime strategies. Sleeping pills may be temporary relief, but they can be addicting. Slip into the arms of Morpheus in natural ways instead. Cherries and cherry juice contain high levels of melatonin, which is found in most over-the counter sleep aids.
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Virgo
Things may suddenly make sense to you, and you may see the error of some your ways. You’re not sure when this epiphany occurred, perhaps when you saw a glimpse of yourself stuffing pork rinds into your mouth. Watch yourself eat a grilled chicken sandwich instead. It’ll look a lot better.
Libra
Worry may have troublesome effects on your entire fabric of being today. It may cause you to eat too much, or not enough. Fortifying yourself with regular healthy meals is essential. Eating nutritious foods like green salads, poultry and fish every three to four hours will make all the difference.
Scorpio
You debate like a Washington politico even when you don’t have all of the facts. This type of overconfidence could have you taking an embarrassing fall today. That’s when someone will prove to you that Rocky Mountain Oysters aren’t really oysters, and they don’t come from any mountain.
Sagittarius
Coworkers will drive you up the wall today with their bickering and sniping. Keep your head down and stay away from their drama. You may have to take lunch alone, but you’ll be able to enjoy your alphabet soup and turkey club even more if you don’t have to listen to their ceaseless whining.
Capricorn
You’ll plow through today like a steamroller, getting a lot done in the process. You’ll be exhausted at day’s end, so let someone else do the cooking. The waiter at the Italian restaurant will know exactly what you want and a dish of antipasto will be waiting for you before you even sit down.
Aquarius
Conflicts could break out as you and coworkers seem to have different agendas. All parties may have to meet halfway if anything’s to get done. Extend an olive branch by baking cookies for all to enjoy. Of course, disputes could erupt over who gets the chocolate chips, but that won’t be your problem.
Pisces
Sometimes you need to throw all of the facts out the window and just go for broke. Sometimes you need to enjoy a massive chili cheeseburger with a mound of onion rings. And sometimes you don’t need to think about fat and calorie counts, and just enjoy.